Welcome to Salem

I lived in Seattle for five years. Of those five years, I had a vehicle for approximately three of them. I had several friends who had their cars broken into, but I never got touched. I’ve been in Salem for a mere fortnight, and already some idiot smashed a window and ripped out my cheap-ass stereo. They also took my CDs. Luckily, almost all the CDs were ones I burned or I had already ripped the music to my computer. But this isn’t an altogether total loss for me because it has spawned a brilliant scheme. Consider:

First, I will burn a CD with a single track on it. Second, I will label this CD as something like “Super-phat beats! OMG this is awesome music! Listen now!” If this CD ever gets stolen, the thief will only be able to hear one track. This is what the track will repeat over and over again, “If you are listening to this, you’re a moron, you freakin’ thief.” If you have better suggestions for the track, feel free to post them.

I say when life gives you lemons, you make bad lemonade and make somebody else drink it.

Also let this be a reminder to us all, idiots are running amok out there.

9 thoughts on “Welcome to Salem”

  1. you should have it be like a phat beat, but real quiet, so then they have to turn it up. and then come in with some thundering bass and super high high treble screaming. and so in the process, you break their stereo and their ear drums

  2. haha, i like chris’s comment from the Big lebow…I know you were given some lemons steve-o but i could also make some lemonade aswell by you buying my stereo! with a good brotherly discount of course!How bout it?

  3. Insurance is covering the damage…well I got a huge deductible, so most of it I’m paying for. I paid my whole deductible just getting the stupid window fixed. Ford charges a butt load for just a stinkin’ small window. Insurance will be getting me a new stereo, which will probably be a lot nicer than the one I had. Thanks anyway, Tom. 🙂

  4. Greg’s comment about a virus is a good one. Plant a trojan that reports back to your email address and have it silently autorun on the CD, first time they stick it in their computer you own it. You could make it a dual-mode CD so it still plays music with a nice quote from the Big Lebowski as Chris suggests.

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